Showing posts with label Children's Books. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Children's Books. Show all posts

Sunday, 7 May 2023

Out Now: The Peter Allerton Children's Book Anthology

 The Peter Allerton Children's Book Anthology is Out Now


All NINE stories in just one volume!


I am pleased to announce that both the 'Smell of Poo' and 'Beastly Bullies' children's story book collections are now available in one big compilation: 'The Peter Allerton Children's Book Anthology'!

***May 4th 2023: ALL STORIES HAVE BEEN UPDATED TO THEIR LATEST EDITIONS FOR THE FINAL TIME***


Available in both ebook (accessible on any device via the Kindle reader app) and paperback, the stories tend to slightly increase in reading level as they go along, all the way from the first to the ninth.

There should be something for everyone to enjoy in this Anthology, including younger and older kids as well as their caregivers and teachers alike.

'The Peter Allerton Anthology' includes the following stories:

All five 'Smell of Poo' stories plus two bonus 'Pooems':




Including...
funny kids' ghost story chapter book
Ghost Poo & the Haunted Toilet


Plus all four 'Beastly Bullies' tales!:


Including...




Every story features a set of 'follow-up questions'. These unique and humorous tales might be a bit revolting at times but they may make you think a little bit as well? Anyway, I do hope you enjoy reading them!

Please click on the link for 'The Peter Allerton Children's Book Anthology':




Also available: 'The Guide to Managing Your Child's Behaviour: The concise, comprehensive manual for the behaviour management of children of all ages.'

20 years in the making, while probably not a book for kids to enjoy reading(!), I believe there'll be plenty in there to help make them a lot happier in the long run..!

Thank you...

Tuesday, 2 February 2021

The 'Beastly Bullies' Children's Story Book Collection is complete!

 The 'Beastly Bullies' Collection is now available!


All 4 'Beastly Bullies' stories in 1!



Now that 'Peter and the Pet Catcher' is finally finished, all four 'Beastly Bullies' stories are now available as a compilation in both ebook and paperback, for just around half the price altogether!

For reading ages 7-13, 47000 words in total, the collection includes the following rather unusual humorous stories:

Each 'Beastly Bullies' story features a set of 'follow-up' questions as well. These tales may be a little bit disgusting at times but they might also make you think a bit too...

I do hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoyed writing them - thank you for giving them a try!

Sunday, 31 January 2021

Peter and the Pet Catcher Children's Story Book is finally here!

 Peter and the Pet Catcher has arrived!


Well, it's been a while since my last release(!) but now the 'Beastly Bullies Collection' is finally complete!


You can now find 'Peter and the Pet Catcher' on Amazon and can read it on any device via the Kindle Reading App, or in the 'Beastly Bullies Collection' or even the Peter Allerton Anthology (both available in paperback too)!


Click here for Peter and the Pet Catcher


Pets have started to go missing (leaving behind only their tails or toes!) from Little Humstrum and Peter is determined to find out why (especially so he can impress Rose from down the road), at least that is until his next door neighbour adopts the pet from hell..!

Find out how Peter copes with a fearful situation that might even involve a little romance in this funny children’s chapter story book for Primary School kids of all ages to enjoy. Parents and teachers may also like reading this humorous story, while it’s suitable for reluctant readers too.

(for ages 7-12: 11500 words)

Here's a excerpt from Chapter 12: 

‘AAARGH!’ they yelled as he threw it away in horror, but it went spinning in the direction of Rose. She tried to duck but was too slow as the hairy bloodied tail bounced off the top of her head, landing on the floor next to Mike.
‘What the hell Peter?’ she wailed as Mike sprinted back off up the road without so much as a word.
‘Am sorry!’ Peter squeaked with embarrassment.
She glared at him angrily then looked down at the object. ‘Oh no, it’s a cat’s tail…’


Also available now are the 'Beastly Bullies' Collection, an Anthology of both the 'Smell of Poo' and 'Beastly Bullies' Collections combined, and once it's ready I will also be publishing 'A Guide to Managing Your Child's Behaviour' (that one's for caregivers rather than kids - unless they want a sneak peek at the manual so they can stay one step ahead!! ;-).

I hope you are all doing ok in these challenging times! Thanks for visiting!


Peter.

Monday, 12 October 2020

Updated versions now out for all 'Smell of Poo' and 'Beastly Bullies' stories!

2nd Edition updates for all Peter Allerton stories (including the Collection paperback) now available at your Amazon book store!


Dear Readers,


I am pleased to say that all Peter Allerton stories released so far have now been updated to 2020 'Second Editions'!

All of my books are now inscribed with '2nd Edition 2020' inside their front covers. Please note, if you don't have a Kindle, you can download this 'Kindle App Reader' to access them on any device. 

There is also a paperback version of 'The Smell of Poo' Collection and the 'Beastly Bullies' Collection will also be available in print very soon. You can find them here or in your own country's Amazon book store:

Click here for my UK Author Page


It's been over 5 years since I released my first eight stories (plus the 'Smell of Poo' Collection) and to be honest I was afraid to read them again until I finally found the time to edit and update each one. Thankfully, now that I've been able to return to writing, I've had the chance to spend the last month 'tweaking' them.

Mainly they have been updated to improve their prose and flow, including the paperback version. I was actually quite pleasantly surprised when reading them - there were a few surprises in there even for me and I wrote them! (my memory must be getting worse)

Click here for updated versions of all Peter Allerton books (Amazon US)

I probably still won't make time to finally start promoting them, at least not until I've written 'Peter and the Pet Catcher' - something I've been building up to all year (procrastination should be my middle name!).

I would also like to take this opportunity to wish every single one of my readers and visitors here the very best of luck in what has been a turbulent and challenging year for many people around the world.

I hope my books might at least provide a moment's escape for you.

Will be in touch soon about my new story as well as what I hope to be working on next year!


With love,

PA


Monday, 7 September 2020

‘Peter and the Pet Catcher’ - Beastly Bullies Children's Story Book due for 2020!

‘Peter and the Pet Catcher’ - due for (late) 2020 release!


Apologies for the significant delay in the release of ‘Peter and the Pet Catcher’ - the final book in the ‘Beastly Bullies’ children’s story collection!

There’s only one thing worse than writer’s block, and that is not having the time to write..! Moving to a new place, starting a new job and doing my best to help my students with their learning was time consuming to say the least – so sadly I didn't have much time for my new favourite thing... writing!

I’m hoping now that I've scaled back my 'day job' I will have enough time to finally finish Peter’s terrifying (well, at least slightly scary) tale.

In the meantime, I wish you all well and hope that you’re enjoying the other books in the series, along with the ‘Smell of Poo’ stories:

The Smell of Poo Children's Book Collection

Doctor Gremlin and the Battle of the Brats

The League of Disgusting Gentlemen

Jack and the Wish Factory


Thank you so much for visiting my blog. Whether you’re a writer, reader (young or old) or both, please feel free to explore the various pages via the links above.


Saturday, 18 April 2015

Jack and the Wish Factory: A ‘Beastly Bullies’ Children’s Book Collection Story: Out Now!

Jack and the Wish Factory: Another ‘Beastly Bullies’ Children’s Book Collection story is here!


Jack and the Wish Factory is out now and available on Amazon:

The newest story in the 'Beastly Bullies’ Children’s BookCollection', Jack and the Wish Factory tells the tale of a boy who has never had a wish come true! For his twelfth birthday, he decides enough is enough and while his family clap and sing "Happy Birthday" at him, he secretly wishes that if none of his wishes can come true, then nobody else’s should either!

However, Jack’s wish isn’t quite as secret as he thinks and it soon leads to him become involved in a titanic struggle between magical powers – in the end he must choose which side to take and risk facing the consequences...

For ages 7-12, or anybody else who’d like to read it! (14600 words)

Here’s an excerpt from Chapter Two:

I then heard a noise but before I could even open my eyes I felt something tugging at one of the sleeves of my pyjamas. I yelled ‘What?’ and leapt out of bed, frantically looking around the room. The curtains were open again, and this time so was the window! My whole body filled with fear.

I was about to call out to my parents when I felt something pulling at my sleeve once more. I waved my arms about, swinging them at whatever was doing it, and went for the light switch. But just as I did so, something began pulling at my leg too. I opened my mouth to scream as I was completely lifted off the floor and started floating towards the window.



wish factory peter allerton amazon kindle ebook
Click here for Jack and the Wish Factory


Wednesday, 11 February 2015

'League of Disgusting Gentlemen' children's book is out now!

'League of Disgusting Gentlemen' children's book is out now!


The latest story from the 'Beastly Bullies' children's book collection has just been published. It is now available through Amazon:


league disgusting gentlemen children's kindle ebook
League of Disgusting Gentlemen: Available Here


Helen has a big problem. She must help her dad become the next President of the League of Disgusting Gentlemen, but to do so she first has to win the most disgusting contest there has ever been! The question is... can she do it?

Follow Helen as she tries to do the right thing while being stuck in a totally disgusting situation in this funny children’s chapter story book for Middle-Grade Primary School kids to enjoy. Parents and teachers might like reading this humorous story too (which also features Follow-up questions) while it’s suitable for both newly confident and reluctant readers.

For ages 8 to 13 (14000 words)

Here’s an excerpt from the beginning of Chapter One:

‘Let’s get out of here!’ she pleaded. But I couldn’t move. There I was standing on a bus, looking at some old lady’s teeth lying in a puddle of sick. I had the taste of the stink bomb still in my mouth and the sound of people vomiting ringing in my ears, while everyone else just stared at me as the driver shouted at us to get off. I shut my eyes for a moment. How did it come to this...?

*  *  *

It all started at my dad’s club. Only bad things ever seemed to start at that club. I don’t know why he loved it there so much. Maybe it was because when he was there, he could be himself. I mean truly be himself. Burping, farting, swearing, drinking, smoking, telling rude jokes, play-fighting with friends – all the things he enjoyed when he was younger but couldn’t anymore ‘because of society.’ That was what he’d always say. ‘It’s society’s fault!’ So he used to go to his club, every Friday evening, just to be disgusting with his disgusting friends.

The 'League of Disgusting Gentlemen' Beastly Bullies story is available on Amazon:


Wednesday, 28 January 2015

Writing a New Book & the Poverty Gap between Rich and Poor!

A New Book is on its way:

'The League of Disgusting Gentlemen' will be out soon!



My apologies for the lack of new posts the previous week, but guess what – I’ve been writing again!

The next ‘Beastly Bullies’ Children’s Book is in the process of being written. It is suitably titled The League of Disgusting Gentlemen’.

It tells the tale of two horrible rivals who must compete in a disgusting contest to see who will become the next President of The League of Disgusting Gentlemen’. However, things soon get out of hand as they bribe their own daughters to get involved in the struggle, as things become increasingly disgusting and even rather dangerous.

I don’t want to give too much away as it is still a ‘work in progress’, but it will be my lengthiest ever book and I am writing it for 9 to 12 years olds (although younger advanced readers or young teenagers might also like it).

So, watch this space – The League of Disgusting Gentlemen’ will be out in the next month or so! In the meantime, you can enjoy reading the first release in the ‘Beastly Bullies’ Children’s Story book collection: ‘DoctorGremlin and the Battle of the Brats’, available on Amazon:
  


The Gap Between Rich and Poor: it's Growing!


This rather disturbed me so I then did some extra research into the gap between the ‘rich and poor’, I soon discovered that the wealthiest 85 people in the world have more money than the poorest 3.5 billion(!!!), as the BBC tells us here: 

I ask you, is this acceptable? It affects all of us, not least our children! It is most worrying that some of the richest people in the world don’t seem to care at all about the poorest.


To make things worse, by 2016 apparently the top 1% of people on Earth (‘top’ meaning financially, not spiritually!) will own more than the other 99% of humans combined. Inequality is apparently as bad as it’s ever been. You can read more here:


A couple of good books about how the rich selfishly keep on getting richer and how the rest of us must struggle to avoid becoming poorer as a result are:


Hand to Mouth is written by the inspiring Linda Tirado (whom I have seen speak very eloquently about how someone very poor can be much more intelligent than somebody who is very rich. We are who we are, not what we have!).

perkins confessions economic hit man
A firsthand account of international abuses of power

Confessions of an Economic Hit Man by John Perkins – a ‘behind the scenes’ look at how rich countries exploit poor ones and keep their ‘fat cats’ rich and everyone else without financial freedom.

***

Well, I hope you’re not too depressed after reading this sad pause for thought on the state of the world and its ‘haves and have nots’. But if you are, you could try cheering yourself or your kids up with one of my books – (sorry, I have to suggest it):

humorous kids' book
Cheer you or your kids up with a book

I looked for some good resources for kids on the topic of the wealth of the world (or lack of it) but, I couldn't find any! If you know of any, please share them with us in the comment box, thanks. In the meantime, I plan to read this book if I can find the time:

wealth poverty nations landes
Wealth and Poverty - a description

Ok, thanks for reading and take good care of yourselves. I hope to be back soon with some Scientific Facts to blow your mind (or at least cheer you up – it’s easier not to worry too much about the world of humans once you know how big the Universe is or how small a photon is!)!


Saturday, 10 January 2015

Self-publishing guide to POD with Createspace: 'Smell of Poo' Children's Book out in paperback!

The 'Smell of Poo' Children's Book Collection is now available in print!

FYI EDIT 2020: Createspace has now been merged with Amazon Kindle pages. It is now easier to format and publish a print book using 'Kindle Create':

Use Kindle Create to help publish your paperback book


***

After completing the rather arduous task of formatting the text and cover design to suit a high quality paperback edition (see the guide below so you may benefit from this experience), the 'Smell of Poo' collection is now available in print - for those of you who prefer to hold the actual book in your hands (I still prefer the feel of paper to holding my kindle, but maybe I'm just old fashioned?).

You can find it with all the information you need here:

smell poo funny children's book print
The 'Smell of Poo' is now out in glossy paperback!

How to prepare, format and process your book on Createspace - an easy 'Print on Demand' self-publishing guide:

Even though I don't expect to sell too many print versions as they are more expensive than the ebook version, it'll be nice to give out a few copies to friends and family (my parents are afraid of anything with buttons anyway), so the whole POD process has already been worth it in my view...

With regard to the formatting process, people can charge a lot of money to help you but I recommend being patient and trying to manage it for yourself (as much as I appreciate Createspace and their enabling self-publishing authors to print on demand, I did raise my eyebrows at their fees - hence this advice).

If it's just a regular paperback you're going for, i.e. no colour or pictures inside, then it's not too tricky. Just remember to set your margins for the text, have someone redo your cover design with a blurb on the back, and tick all the necessary boxes in createspace in their step by step self-publishing process.

Firstly, for text formatting, you can see the margin requirements here (6x9 is the recommended book size for most regular fiction):
createspace printing options
createspace printing options

For further advice on this, The Creative Penn is as helpful as ever:
creative penn self-publishing printing advice
Print on demand self-publishing advice
Then, go to Fiverr to find someone who can 'redesign' your ebook cover into a paperback cover with all the right dimensions, etc (it needs to be 300dpi, by the way). Personally I used 'Fluxydesign' who I hope you agree did a nice job:
fiverr createspace POD cover design
createspace POD cover design

children's funny poo paperback cover
Here's the full glossy paperback cover with spine - not bad eh?
Createspace give you a choice of 'matte' or 'glossy' covers. They say that matte is better for fiction / glossy for non-fiction, however for children's books I was advised by an experienced self-published author (see the next link) to still go with glossy - aren't we all usually still drawn to shinier things after all..?
Matte or Glossy book cover
Matte or Glossy book cover?
For the book description section, make sure you have your 'metadata' ready with lots of keywords to help your readers find your book, while also making sure it matches what is in the book itself! Here's a few hints and tips from 'The Book Designer':
Guide to Metadata / Keywords for ebooks bookdesigner
Guide to Metadata / Keywords for ebooks
Incidentally, Createspace also give you the option of choosing a FREE ISBN for your book, which will save you a fair bit of change if you're on a budget.

Everything else in the createspace process was so simple that I'm sure most people will be ok, i.e. selecting distribution channels, pricing and so on - it's a bit of a 'no brainer' really and basically depends on your own intentions.

However, it isn't too obvious that you can 'create' your own createspace estore! It is already set up for your but you can change the colours and background and even add your own banner. Here is a guide to help you along with this:
publishing solo guide createspace estore
Guide to creating your own Createspace 'estore'!
For resizing an image for your banner (good luck with this!) I found the best way was to simply do a 'print screen', paste it into Microsoft Paint, then resize it there. This link might help you if you're as 'techno challenged' as me..:
Guide to 'resizing' with Microsoft Paint
Guide to 'resizing' with Microsoft Paint
Phew, having just written this post it actually seems like quite a lot - but compared to going through the process of finding an agent, then finding a publisher, then getting published and making any kind of profit or reaching a potentially large audience, Createspace and their kind are heaven sent!

Good luck with the self-publishing process! If you have any other useful hints or tips, please leave a comment...
smell poo funny children's book print
The 'Smell of Poo' is now out in glossy paperback!